Category Archives: All Posts

Vital Information Not Just for Caregivers

Posted on by

Are you familiar with these terms: Durable Power of Attorney? Health Care Directive? Advanced Directives? What is the difference between a Living Will and a Health Care Directive? Have you made end of life decisions for yourself as well as your family (all ages)? Are they up-to-date? Does the physician and hospital have copies?

We are often careful to make sure these things are in place for the elderly; for those in our care. However, every day we hear of accidents, crimes, and illnesses with no respect to age or infirmity. Suppose you or a loved one faces a major crises; have decisions been made before hand concerning the wishes of the individual?

Recently I attended an End of Life Seminar presented by a Hospital Hospice Group. Every individual should attend such a conference. In our state of Missouri, hospice groups not only provide for the individual nearing death, they provide needed resources for the client and family. They are equipped to answer concerns about financial needs and grief counseling. Hospice is also suited for dealing with pain; it is what they do on a regular basis and they are very good at it.

Only when you are no longer able to make or communicate your decisions does your advance directive go into effect. Generally it is effective until the time of your death and is valid in another state, especially if it is both notarized and witnessed. The right to make an advance directive has been constitutionally affirmed. Healthcare providers have both legal and ethical duties to respect the patient’s wishes.

I know from personal experience, even knowing Mother’s wishes, it is often difficult to let them go when that time comes. We want to hold on to our loved ones as long as possible. Let me give you a sentence to hold on to that will help you immensely in that situation: It is not about you or me, it is about them. Remember their desires and honor what the patient wanted as much as possible.

In this short article, it is impossible to address these issues in depth. I am hoping I will have perked your interest enough to seek out some help and make sure these things are in place for yourself, your client, and your family. Contact your local hospice groups for direction and help. Many of these issues can be handled safely and legally through local agencies without the cost of attorneys. Be sure you know your state’s requirements.

I believe the most important end of life issue was settled on the cross. For myself, I know where I am going and Jesus paid the price. I’m thankful for the peace that promise brings. I would like to simply close my eyes some night and open them in the arms of the Lord but that is not mine to determine. However, I want to do all I can to make my leaving easier for those who will care for me in the end. I hope this article will be of help to you.

Hugs and Blessings,

Click on the box in the upper right hand corner for my newsletter and free gifts. Be sure to leave a comment, I want to hear from you.

Weary Caregiver Last Straw or Surprise Blessing

Posted on by

Often when we are consumed with the daily tasks of caregiving, we do more reacting to situations than acting upon them. Such was the case recently as I faced an unusual dilemma at our country home.

For  several days, some stray  chickens wandered up and down the gravel road in front of our house. Most moved on or were captured except for one lone fat, white hen.

My family and I had to be out of town a few days and I was sure she would disappear like the others while we were gone. We returned late and tired only to find our front porch was filled with leaves, feathers, and “presents” from the hen. She had claimed a soft cushioned chair as her personal roost.

This chicken was more than a nuisance to me; I abhorred her messes; I was not at all pleased with what she was doing to my flowerbeds and front yard; and I was frustrated over all the failed efforts to get rid of her. No one claimed ownership; friends promising help never showed up.

I resented the time she stole from me; I needed to be focused on other duties, not finding a home for a chicken. I considered a fried chicken dinner with biscuits and gravy as an option until I recalled what it takes to get from live chicken to frying pan!

Today I quietly watched her through our screen door. She was a beautiful bird, only God could color those feathers exactly right so they formed a beautiful pattern on her wings.  She strutted around as if she were queen of her domain; and, at that moment, she was!

As that proud bird hunted and pecked in the green grasses, I thought of families who would give much to have just one chicken. There are hungry people here in America as well as in other countries. A stray bird could mean an occasional egg for breakfast or perhaps make several meals including stock for a soup.

We and those we care for will go to bed tonight with full tummies (without killing the chicken) and someone will eventually claim her as their own. I will replant my flowers and scrub the porch and wait for the next great adventure to unfold.

Wherever you are in your life’s journey, I pray today you can look at those inevitable “stray chickens” that come to roost in a different light. What would God have you see from the experience? No matter how heavy your load, do you have a little something you might share to encourage another right now? What can you choose to be thankful for in your present situation?

“If you spend yourselves on behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like the noonday. The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.”  Isaiah 58:10-11

Hugs,

P.S. In counting my blessings, you are tops. Thanks for dropping by; don’t forget to sign up for my newsletter and keep your eye out for “stray chickens.”

Family Friend Neighbor Caregiver Who am I

Posted on by

I have met some of the most amazing professional caregivers. They have given time and more energy than I could  ever muster to care for others. Their patience seems in constant supply– their knowledge of what to do in any circumstance is unbelievable.

I am not one of those! Never have been, never will be. When I began my caregiving website, I fought it because “I wasn’t a real caregiver.” I am amazed at what is now available and want others to know. We need each other!

There are more than 65 million Family Caregivers in this country who work day in and day out to provide care as no “outsider” could. They often work other jobs; have children and parents to care for at the same time; struggle with lack of finances and health issues of their own. Most have no previous experience apart from life experiences as they grew into adulthood.

Are you one of those? Do you know others who are?

November is National Family Caregivers Month. It’s a great time to reflect on your personal caregiving journey and, at the same time, to find ways to encourage others who are caring for friends and family.

Ask God to give you a sensitive spirit toward the needs of others even as you struggle with your own needs. If you are a caregiver yourself, you may not feel you can spare the time or energy to reach out to help another. I have found that in my busiest, most hectic days, there was always time to pray for someone else. That is the first step; open your eyes and heart and look for others who could use a prayer. Taking a few minutes to pray, call, or send a card moves the focus from self to others and tends to multiply your time.

The internet is overloaded with free helps.  Consider encouraging a non-computer caregiver with an article on some issue they may be facing. My favorite site is www.familycaregiving101.com for dozens of free articles. I will soon provide more great sites to explore.

“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” Psalm 139:14

“We are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.’ Ephesians 2:10

In your weary moments, I pray you’ll never lose sight of the fact that you are a very special and unique creation.  Blessings to you as you continue to share the wonder of God’s love with others.

Hugs,

P.S.  Click the button at the upper right corner of my website at www.susiekinslowadams.com and sign up for the newsletter; it will be helpful to you.  I welcome your comments and questions. Have a blessed week.