Tag Archives: family

Holiday Stress Tips on Gift Giving Part Two

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Gift lists can be overwhelming; family, friends, caregivers, others who serve us. Stress occurs when we can’t find ‘just the right’ gift or money is tight. Who do we give gifts to? Is our gift giving really  gift exchange? Do we ever give  out of duty, expectations, or guilt?

Each year I listen to shoppers rushing to fill long lists in little time; usually spending over their budget. Many comment on difficulty buying for a certain person on their list. Some honestly admit they do not want to give him or her anything but feel obligated.

Please note: I realize you may have packages purchased and wrapped for this year. If it has been frustrating, or you have not finished or even begun, now is the perfect time to spend a few minutes thinking through your personal priorities regarding gifting.

Here are a few simple tips that have served me well.

#1 Adjust your attitude. Are you still looking for a “thank you” for the special gift you sent last year? Sadly, thank you cards and calls seem in short supply in our world today. Gifts given out of a heart of love and compassion and not from guilt or duty have already received a thank you. The giving of each gift, no matter how large or small, will bring you true joy.

#2 Is there something only you can give? Does your work or hobby provide something others would appreciate? For instance, if you enjoy creating cards, make them a dozen beautiful cards with envelopes. Include stamps and a pen and you have a personal gift that says you really care.

#3 Consider the needs of the recipient. Before giving a beautiful plate of homemade candy and cookies to a family, inquire about health and nutrition restrictions. A small houseplant or greenery can be a welcome gift; it can also be an extra burden to one who doesn’t need something else to care for.

#4 Other than family, what other gifts do you want to give? Boss? Co-workers? Church or other groups?  Is there a spending limit? Check this list carefully. Are you giving because you want to or because you feel compelled to do so? I have personally found relationship issues I needed to deal with before offering a gift.

#5 Determine who you will be giving gifts to in your family. Will you be drawing names? Will you continue to buy large gifts for your children after they leave the nest? What about their children, and their children? If you don’t set guidelines up front, your list may get longer and longer as your budget gets smaller. Do you have something set aside for those who drop by unexpectedly?

#6 What about those who care for your needs; i.e., postman, beautician, delivery persons, favorite waitress or waiter?

My experience as a giver and as a recipient of much giving, has led me to believe the most needed gift is love. Allow me to rephrase that statement: The Greatest Gift IS Love. We know Jesus is the Greatest Gift; He came to earth, lived, died, and rose again all because of God’s Love for us. Therefore, the greatest of all our gifts to one another should be love.

Hugs,

What has been my best shopping tip for over 30 years that I still practice today? Visit me next week and find out. Why not give someone my address this week so they can get the newsletter, too? You have signed up, right?

 

Holiday Stress Part One Cards and Letters

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For my caregiver friends busy with family,  elderly parents and others, does it seem the holiday season landed over night? With it more responsibility is added to our over-filled calendars. Can you relate?

Before you stress thinking about extra work,  grab a pen and paper. We’ll spend a few minutes looking at things that bug you when left unattended.  I have found my life goes much smoother if I can keep the bugs out!

List things that seem to eat up your time and thoughts.  Look objectively at the whole picture. When you finish,  circle no more than three things that bother you most. If you are like me, it is the little things that seem to weigh heavy day after day, not unlike a tiny gravel in your shoe.

My top three will seem as nothing compared to yours. That is what we are wanting, to identify the things real and personal to you. Using mine as an example should encourage you to work on your list. (Remember to contact me anytime.)

Number one on my list used to bug me every year. Energetic, organized friends and family sent out wonderful, newsy cards right after Thanksgiving. Immediately I felt guilty for not having done mine. I barely had time to read the letters, certainly not answer them, make a call or send a card.  They seemed to stack up all over the place and I could never imagine throwing them away unacknowledged.

I need to say here that I love getting cards and letters, anytime. People spend time to write a letter or choose a card. They spend money on cards and stamps and trips to the mailbox. I value each precious card I get. It isn’t the cards or letters, it is what to do with them. I don’t want them lost in a bunch of junk mail or tossed out when read.

Here is a simple solution I began a few years ago.

1. Provide a place for them. I found a colorful basket with a handle at a thrift shop that is perfect. The cards can stand on end and be easily seen.

2. I keep an inexpensive address book at the back of the basket to jot down current addresses or personal information gleaned from the letters. I put return addresses on the back of the card so it’s ready to answer.

3. I put the “Blessing Basket” on the same table each year for all to enjoy. I have read them many times over to those in my care. The colorful pictures are good conversation starters with children or elderly patients. When appropriate, share stories about the sender.

4. In  January and February, I often answer the cards, a few at a time. Simply pulling one out at random is like entertaining an unexpected guest. As time permits, I write notes even to those who simply signed their cards. What beautiful “visit” I’ve had on dreary winter days. When I cared for Mother, I wrote letters for her in January, it was a fun time.

5. My basket of cards is also a prayer reminder; thankful to God for each person who took time to send one. Praying for their needs at least once or twice a year makes me feel closer to them. Now I look forward to those early birds and their notes.

We’ll take on #2 on my list in our next visit. I think you may have a similar item on your list; it has to do with gifts.

In the meantime, I want to say I am so very, very thankful for each of you taking time to “listen” to my chatter. I pray for you and do hope to be a help an encouragement in your journey.

Hugs,

Let me hear from you soon. And do sign up for my newsletter at the top of this page.

 

 

Family Weather and Best Laid Plans

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Breaking away from my caregiver tips and ideas today to share with you an exciting celebration in our home today, Saturday, November 23.

We were married in a blizzard in Joplin, Missouri, on January 13, 1979. Knowing the near certainty of bad weather in January, we reasoned it would be more practical to have an early celebration while the weather was still warm. Beautiful fall colors adorned the sunny hillsides as I sent out formal invitations decorated with snowmen. We cleaned the house, from the carpets to the porches and beyond. We anticipated the green hillside filled with romping wee ones and a campfire going for hot dogs and s’mores.

Carrying out the winter snowman theme, we purchased a variety of large snowmen to adorn the property. Some we attached to the utility shed, propped them on the front fence and near our big trees by the road.  Cans of fake snow were ready to mix for a touch of reality on the walkways and around the snowmen. (Did you know you could buy cans of snow? God found these for us but then that’s another story!)

Inside the house we unpacked my dozens of cute snowmen and decked the halls.  We were giddy as the little kids as we enthusiastically decorated and planned. Snowmen adorned the fireplace mantel, every shelf and table in sight. Large snowmen had  messages of encouragement and hope  on their scarves.

Are you ready for this?  It turned bitter cold here in SW Missouri, windy and frigid; one forecaster suggested a possibility of snow. All of the leaves turned brown and fell to the ground. Hoping to make the best of a bad situation, hubby made some big piles of leaves for the kids to play in. However, the cold was followed by rain, a day and a half of rain and wind.  The high for the day was to be 37 degrees.

It was still a blast for us to prepare for our family as we reminisced and rejoice over 35 miraculous years together.

We were concerned about making Jesus more personal to our family and friends without sounding preachy. We designed a short skit revealing how God was personally at work in each of our lives through the years. These are the truths we hoped to convey to our family:

1. Although we did not always follow Him in our lives, Jesus never left us.

2. After we each lost our first mates, God clearly drew us together to form a  family.

3. Jesus wants a real, personal relationship with everyone.

4. Church is not our “job”. We do what we do because of the love of Jesus. We love the church because Jesus loved it.

The little skit opened up some real, serious communication between us and our children. It was amazing to sense God at work in such a simple, non-threatening way of talking about our faith.

Whatever your situation, my earnest prayer for each of you is that you will recognize from this article how personal God wants to be in your life. I’m thankful for my family and friends and each of you who have taken time to allow me into your world for a few minutes each week.

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