Tag Archives: mother

Caring for Others Palliative Care Option

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Needless stress can be alleviated as we learn options available. One object of this column is to help caregivers and caring families know about choices available. I was not aware until recently of palliative care; what it meant and who may need it. Perhaps, you also find the term unfamiliar.

As we learned last week, hospice care is generally for patients with life expectancy of six months or less. Palliative care is an area of healthcare that focuses on relieving and preventing the suffering of patients without dealing with the underlying cause. This care may be available in all disease stages, not simply end-of-life situations.

The rapidly growing field of pediatric palliative care has clearly shown the need for services geared specifically for children with serious illness.

Immediate palliative care is indicated for patients with serious illness and who have physical, psychological, social, or spiritual distress as a result of the treatment they are seeking or receiving. Palliative care increases comfort by lessening pain, controlling symptoms, and lessening stress for the patient and family, and should not be delayed when it is indicated. Palliative care  can increase quality of life and lengthen the patient’s life.

Depending on the circumstances and need, both hospice and palliative care are provided by a team of physicians, pharmacists, nurses, social workers, chaplains, various therapists, volunteers and family. It would be wise to visit with your primary physician concerning the help available to you or your loved one. As with any care, this may not be a viable option for you; be sure to become well-informed.

Several of you are facing complicated issues. From personal experience, I also know when in the middle of a crisis or potential crisis, it is difficult to make sound decisions. I cannot stress enough to communicate, not only with your health care providers, but also family and volunteers who may be helping you.

During the years I took care of Mother, it was often an aide or friend of the family who had been in similar circumstances and therefore, provided some timely information.

I believe our loving Heavenly Father equips many people according to their gifts to help others cope when the inevitable trials come. My husband has served as a hospice chaplain nearly twenty years and often shares with me how God has worked through ordinary people to accomplish great things.

My prayer is that you will trust and rely on Him for guidance in all your decisions and never lose hope.

Hugs,

Please let me know if you found this helpful to you. I would like to hear from those who have used this care. Next week we’ll look on the lighter side of caring for others. Blessings to you.

5 Problem Solving Helps When Caring for Others

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Anna is primary caregiver for her mother and stretched to the max keeping up with work, family, and life. She is somewhat relieved that her ailing mother is now in a good extended care facility; and they keep her informed of any changes in her mother’s physical condition or her care. Or, so she thought.

On a recent visit, she found her mother’s condition had worsened, and no one had prepared Anna for drastic changes in her care. Her initial reaction was to feel angry, hurt, and helpless. Often she was made to feel like an intruder as she began to question the changes.

As parents, friends, relatives or primary caregivers, we each will come face-to-face with sudden emergencies and need to be prepared to deal properly with them. Here are some helpful tips to avoid or at least ease the tension of these situations. We’ll look at what Anna learned from personal experience and from a gentle nurse who sensed her frustrations and told her, “you wait right here. I will not let you leave until I get the answers for you concerning your mother’s care”. It was clear, this nurse loved what she was doing; she wanted to help people and encourage co-workers.

1. You are often the patient’s advocate whether you asked for the position or not. They may not be able to express their needs. The same inadequate care or neglect may be happening to other patients; those in charge need to hear from you. Do not hesitate to go directly to the administrator, physician, or others in charge for clarification and direction.
2. When someone in your care enters a new facility, document everything you can. Post names of employees who give especially reliable care and those you have cause to question. When things are not as they should be in the facility or with the patient, make a note of it and who is working at the time.
3. Take time to assess the current situation. Ask yourself, is this really of prime importance to her overall care and well-being? Am I over-reacting? Stop. Take time to honestly evaluate your position. You do not want to complicate the problem by acting in haste.
4. Proceed kindly with determination to find solutions. Resolve to be kind to everyone involved. You may need to stop more than once to breathe deeply, relax, and continue in a better frame of mind.
5. Strive to be an encourager, even in difficult times. Many of the employees are doing the best they can. As they say, “don’t let one bad apple spoil the whole bunch.”
6. Remember why you are there as well. Are you caring for your loved one from a loving heart, out of duty, or some other reason?

It can prove extremely difficult from time to time to care for others. However, if we do it because we love them, the task becomes much easier. As we grow into better caregivers, the patients feel genuinely loved,  accepted and cared for.

As I read over these helps, I see they can apply to all areas of our lives; children in schools, on the job, at work or play. People of all ages and health need the same thing—love, acceptance, and hope for a good day. You can be the instrument today to help another.

Praying you will feel that love and acceptance and an extra surge of energy and hope as you care for others along your path.

Hugs,

Let me hear from you soon. Be sure you are signed up for my newsletter (pretty box in the top right hand corner) as I have exciting, encouraging things to share in the weeks to come.  Thanks.

Making Resolutions that Count

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Making Resolutions that Count

my deer

A new year’s arrival means time for our family to evaluate and plan. We make resolutions, and often fail in the first week to keep them. We look back and wonder where time went and what we did worthwhile. Seems if we can’t list grand things accomplished, we  feel we failed altogether.

I received a note from today reminding me it’s not the big “important” things that are significant, it’s the day-to-day tasks we do for others that are priceless. A caring daughter wrote:

“Mother is 90 and definitely a trooper. I felt so helpless in helping her with her leg cramps from low potassium. I massaged and covered them with warmed blankets. I know you can relate to sitting up all night in a hospital room chair!”

Yes, I can relate to those seemingly endless days and nights. And so can some of you. Many of my readers are caring for at least one person now. I want you to know, caring for and loving others is the most important thing you can ever do.

Today I learned a former classmate died last night, that makes four in the past two years, and we are not that old! I planned to visit through the years, at least correspond more, but there seemed never enough time.

I am resolved to care more this year; to listen more earnestly; to pray more faithfully for others; and to regularly call or send notes to those who need encouragement.

A lady in her 90’s calls each month to let me know she gets our latest ministry newsletter and that she read it all and prayed for each need. When we miss her call,  she leaves a sweet message. I’m calling her tomorrow, just to let her know what a blessing she is to us.

Do you have people in your life that have been a blessing to you? Do you know others who could use a blessing about now? It’s near zero here today and will be tomorrow; I wonder how many people living alone could use a call from me just to cheer them and help shorten their day by giving them some encouragement?

Today I put my note cards, pens, stamps, and address book on my desk and plan to use them every week. How about you?

Hugs,

Be sure you are signed up for my newsletter (pretty box in the top right hand corner) as I have exciting, encouraging things to share in the weeks to come. Let me hear from you soon. Thanks.

P.S. Did you find the two beautiful deer in the photo? They were enjoying the brush we left for them this year. Photo taken from my kitchen window. I thank God for His blessings everyday!