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Safe Place to Share and to Learn

Posted on August 20, 2014 by adminOctober 26, 2016

Where you can go now to get information and share information.

As we look at statistics about caregivers and who they are, think about your own situation or someone you know who is caring for someone on a regular basis. Where do you go for help? Who will understand? I want to share a great place to find some help and encouragement.

A few statistics about family caregivers.

Three out of four family caregivers who care for someone over the age of 18 either work now or have been working while providing care. Two thirds have had to either give up their jobs or have made adjustments to their work life. One in five family caregivers have had to take a leave of absence.

Family caregivers spend an average of twenty hours a week caring for their loved ones. Many provide 40 hours a week or more.

You are not alone in your situation.

We can easily see that we are not alone in our struggles to care for others and ourselves. Years ago, I felt like I was the only person who would understand my frustrations and yes, even my joys. I would have benefited much from someone who had walked the path before me.

Two lessons I learned when caring for Mother.

Often we get overloaded and stressed out when we are not aware of helps available. I have learned two great lessons through my caregiving years:

1. I cannot do everything myself either physically or mentally.

2. It is worth my time to learn what others are doing in my situation; to explore options.

Here is information about my favorite caregiving website.

I have found this website to be full of helpful ideas and solutions from those who have been in a similar situation and learned from it.

This on-line resource has undergone some upgrades recently; there are many free articles, videos and e-books available as well as items to purchase. There are even contests and games if you have time for a little diversion.

I was privileged to write a few articles for some of their gift book series. The website address for Caregiving.com is http://www.caregiving.com and I think you will find it helpful.

For most of us, finding a safe place to chat and share our hearts is all we need. Talking things out is often the best answer to our problems. Please do let me know if this is helpful to you.

Hugs,

Looking forward to hearing from you; you are an encouragement to me. Watch for great news coming soon; you’ll be the first to know!

A Personal Note of Encouragement and Love

Posted on August 9, 2014 by adminOctober 26, 2016

When your schedule is overwhelming, stop and bless someone’s day.

I took time to realistically look at my calendar and my work schedule this week; they will never match up. I thought of all the correspondence I was going to write; all the cabinets I wanted to clean; all the little extras I planned to do for those in my care.

I wondered about you. Each of you hold a special place in my heart. I know a few of you quite well; others slightly; still others only through seeing your name on my list and praying for you and your family. I wonder how your summer has gone and if, in even the least of ways, my notes have truly offered you help and hope.

You can stop and regroup; even a few moments can change your day.

This morning I woke up to the sound of refreshing rain on the roof. I walked outside on the porch, drank in that cool, clean air, and felt as though I could conquer the world (for a brief moment). I’m thankful for those times. I wish fresh air and sunshine for your busy days.

Later I stood in the hot sun and greeted a busload of young church campers as they tumbled out and gathered their belongings. Though clearly tired and ready for home, many made time to give me bear hugs and smiles and tell me about their new friends and what they had learned at camp. Most will be in school soon and back to a rigid schedule of study and play. Summer has somehow seemed all too short. I wish for you hugs from wee ones; they warm our hearts.

If you bake, garden, or cook a good casserole, find someone to share it with today.

I thought of you today as we enjoyed our lunch. Gardening friends shared their wares with us; we had a banquet from four different families! We had ripe red sliced tomatoes and green beans and new potatoes from Dorothy; cucumbers and onions from Barbara; corn on the cob from a Mennonite neighbor; and cold, ripe cantaloupe from Eunice for dessert. I wanted to invite you over to share our bounty!

I know many of you are busier than I, struggling to make it through the day. You can only hope for someone to drop you off some groceries or take time to hug a bit.

It’s unusual for us to have this bounty from neighbors; just a good gardening year here, I guess. It certainly isn’t because we “look hungry” that they brought food by for us! I do appreciate it; every bite.

What I appreciate most is that someone thought of us in that way. Now, I can’t come by your house today and deliver you some goodies or hold your hand or hug your neck.

Here are a few things I can do for you today.

1. I can encourage from an understanding heart. I have been there, in the trenches and in the good times. I know firsthand that every caregiver, parent, or child needs hope, love and understanding.

2. I can pray for you. I believe that the love of God knows no boundaries. I believe He cares for us in ways we cannot understand. I believe He wants to comfort you and strengthen you and those you love.

3. I can listen to you. I am a good listener. Sometimes, just talking helps. I want to encourage you, if nothing else, to set aside a few minutes each day to journal your thoughts and your feelings. Be honest with them. And, please let me know when a column meets your need. Let me know how I can be a better encourager for you personally.

Well, lots of chattering today. Sometimes it’s good to just sit down and talk to an old friend. I really do care about you; I hope you know Jesus cares.

Looking forward to hearing from you soon.

Next week I will share about my favorite website and some helpful hints. Invite others to join our family by signing up for the mailing list at the colorful box in the upper right hand corner of the page.

5 Tips on Communicating with Alzheimers or Dementia Patients

Communicating with Alzheimers or Dementia Patients

Whether friend, family or caregiver, communicating with Alzheimers or dementia patients is stressful and often awkward and uncomfortable.

Consider how confusing and frustrating this must be to the individual coping with these changes. Here are some useful tips to ease tension and encourage open communication.

Make eye contact as you enter the room. Look directly into their eyes when you talk. For the best results in establishing any communication, do not look down on the person. If they are seated, sit beside them when possible. Talking at eye level communicates genuine caring.
Address the person by his/her name; the name they are familiar with. Be sure your voice and expressions give clear signs of love and concern. Avoid using “sweetie” or “honey” as they need to hear and recognize their own name.
Be sensitive of the individuals’ personal space. A confused person may feel threatened if you are too close or you insist on hugging them. Observe heir reactions to know what touching is acceptable. A warm handshake and caring smile will help them grow comfortable in your presence and feel less threatened.
Listen for key words or phrases. As you begin to understand what they are trying to talk about, try repeating a sentence or two in your own words. Letting others know you are truly wanting to understand will go a long way in opening dialog.
Proceed with confidence. Remember the person you know and love is still there and most likely wants/needs to share his/her feelings. Do not be afraid to attempt conversation, however limited it may be.

As you find comfortable ways to show love and acceptance of your loved one, you will be rewarded. The reward may come in an unexpected kiss on the cheek, a squeeze of your hand, or a simple gleam in the eye of one hungering for assurance.

Imagine for a moment how you would feel if you could not share your feelings or desires with others. Often a confused person is waiting for affirmation and encouragement and you and I can do that for them.

Blessings on you as you give of your best to a hurting world.

Hugs,

Thanks to those who are letting me know how the weekly newsletters have benefited you. Be sure you are signed up and encourage others to do so.