Look at the faces of Wayne and Barbara as they listen intently to Dr. Wade Paris sharing God’s Word from his heart.

I want to listen like that; not just to a speaker, but to every person who wants to talk to me. I want my face to light up with compassion and love. I want to really hear what they are saying.

Compassionate listening is an art; it takes practice. It takes patience. It takes time. In our hectic, busy world, one of the greatest gifts we can give to our family and to others is taking time to listen well.

Click here for some wisdom from the Great Listener.

Charles Dickens said: “No one is useless in the world who lightens the burden of it to anyone else.” One of the best ways to lighten a load is to learn to become a good listener.

Proverbs 18:13 “To answer before listening— that is folly and shame.”

Here are a few ideas as together we learn to become better listeners.

• Try not to judge another person’s reactions or give unsolicited advice. You may not relate to what the person is saying, but it is real to them. This can be tricky if you are caring for someone with memory issues; however, they need a compassionate ear.
• Learn to give appropriate feedback. Instead of saying, “I know how you feel,” try saying, “That must be difficult for you.” Or simply “I’m sorry you are feeling this way.” As I visited with a recent widow, I could not say I knew how she felt even though I have lost two husbands. My experience was not hers; I can understand the hurt, but I needed to hear her story, hold her hand, and say “I’m so sorry.”
• Consider the health and well-being of the person. Do they have family and friends nearby? Are they confined to a chair, bed, or room for most of their time? Before you hurriedly walk away, realize you may be the only person who actually took a few minutes to listen to their story.
• Watch carefully for clues as someone talks to you. Do they sound overly worried about what should be an insignificant matter? Could there be more to the story than is being said, hidden reasons for their concern?
• This last tip may seem to be the most obvious. However, it is often the most neglected. Give a smile and a gentle hug. A smile has a tremendous healing effect on everyone. Pray for the situation when appropriate; at least add them to your personal prayer list. A simple pat on the hand or shoulder and a genuine smile can make someone’s day. Good medicine for them–and good for you!

As you take time to really listen, you will reduce tension and build trust. Go the extra mile. Keep a small notebook handy and jot down concerns or things to remember for the next conversation.

Have a great week and, as you listen to others, allow time to listen to Our Heavenly Father as well; He is the ultimate Compassionate Listener. He longs to listen to you!

Hugs,

Your comments are a part of listening; I look forward to hearing from you.