Tag Archives: caring for others

Surprising Profit from an Affordable Vacation, Part 1

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affordable vacationNote: this is a two-part series, trust me on this one; well worth your time to read it all.

Are you over-stressed and desperately in need of an affordable vacation?

Do you find yourself snapping at people, upset over small things, wanting to run away?  Are you dreaming of ocean breezes, comfy motel rooms, sightseeing, no cooking, no laundry? Time to leave cares behind and relax and refresh?

Does that sound like Mission Impossible in your circumstances?

Last month I reached to point of physical and mental exhaustion. My job, my writing and my homemaking all suffered and I could see no way out. I had neither time nor money for a real vacation. Have you been there? Are you there now?

How does that happen to us? Is there help and hope?

Circumstances differ: you may be caring for others and dealing with family, health, weather, financial woes, deadlines, etc.  For me, while still rebounding from my unplanned 40-day hospital stay, a hacker locked up all my word processing files and my photos. For an office manager and a secretary, this was devastating. With no backup on the computer, I found myself struggling to accomplish the smallest tasks. Boxes and stacks of papers added to the chaos.

I longed for a vacation but there was no funds, no time.

Work continued to fall behind, family matters were left unattended, my health began to suffer again. Overwhelmed, I pushed harder only to find myself more stressed. In the midst of this, a wise coach insisted I take a vacation. She said simply stop trying to meet deadlines, and tend only to my very basic daily needs.

In the midst of my muddle, she said, “You have to take a vacation.”

I was told to take at least two or three weeks to organize and refocus my life. I was instructed to call it vacation; to treat it as a vacation, and act accordingly. This worked for me, and I assure you, it can work for you.

I have two assignments for you this week.

#1 spend a few minutes each day writing down your thoughts on a vacation.If someone paid expenses and took care of all your obligations at home, where would you go? What would you do? Would the end result be a band-aid or a real fix to your situation? Would you come home to the same problems, perhaps more so? Is a vacation away from home what you really need?

The second assignment is most important; think it through carefully. 

#2 Take an inventory of your life. What really bugs you about your situation? Are there things at home you never get around to doing? People you need to see? Calls you need to make? Letters you need to write? There will never, ever be enough time to catch up. Next week I will be telling you exactly what I did on my “vacation” and the results. You will be surprised. I certainly was.

Until then, blessings and hugs,

Do me a favor. Share this link with someone you know that could use a little encouragement right now. Better yet, send them a copy of my book (follow the link to the right). And don’t forget to leave me a comment, they are a great encouragement to me.

4 Vital Steps in Caring for Others

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4 Vital Steps in Caring for OthersEach day provides opportunity for error regardless of your situation.

Whether you are dealing with a short-term medical issue, a lengthy illness or care of the elderly, you may face seemingly endless moving the patient from home to the hospital, to an extended care facility and hopefully back home. Each move provides opportunity for error as patients are placed into a strange environment with people tending to them who are not familiar with their situation.

Here are several suggestions to make each transition easier on you as caregiver as well as for the patient. Quite often it is the simple, routine things unattended that cause major interruptions in care.

1. Keep a list of current medications and have them available to attendants as needed. Also, be sure to check this list against their list to make sure all of the medicines were transferred properly from one place to another. This is so very, very important and takes little time on your part.

2. Get to know the team even if the stay is to be brief. I continue to be amazed at the noticeable difference in care when I take time to learn the attendant’s name and treat each with respect. Most are there because they love people and want to provide adequate care for each patient. Too often they work under difficult conditions and long hours. A friendly encounter can be a breath of fresh air to a weary soul.

3. Keep the primary physician and others attending informed of all changes in behavior, eating habits, and reactions to foods or medicines. (I did not communicate well with Mother’s physician when she began not to talk. I thought it was just her stubborn will. Was it, or was something else going on that he may have been able to help?)

4. When making even minor decisions, consider the patient — make them according to their needs and preferences and not yours alone. Look around the room before you leave, do you need to tidy up the nightstand or close the blinds. Sounds trivial, doesn’t it? Would it be if you were flat on your back and couldn’t do anything all night and day but worry about the irritation, whatever it might be?

I’m thankful for each hospital and health care facility and the many dedicated people who work in them. Generally they proved to be a safe haven for Mother, a place for her to get good care, as well as a place for me to get a much-needed rest from the daily responsibilities of decision making. However, I soon found it was not a time to sit idly by and entrust her care entirely to others.

You have to be an advocate for

A nurse told me early on, “you have to be an advocate for your mother. You must check and recheck and let people know when things are not right.” I was tired and hurt and scared. I didn’t want to be a strong patient advocate any more; I wanted Mommy to hold me and tell me it was going to be okay.

Often I found comfort and encouragement in God’s Word, I trust you will, too. “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything; tell God your needs and don’t forget to thank him for his answers. If you do this you will experience God’s peace … “ Philippians 4:6-7

Hugs,

Thoughts gleaned from my book, MY MOTHER MY CHILD. Click here to learn more.

Also available as e-book, click here: MY MOTHER MY CHILD Kindle Edition

Losing Ourselves While Caring for Others

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As we focus on those we care for; we can lose our own identity.

It is easy to lose yourself in caring for others, whether it’s our family, little children, or someone whose health needs demand our attention. We care with our whole hearts; our whole being. This is a big part of who we are and we do not want that to change.

However, as needs of the moment multiply, and they will, we can become absorbed in the task of simply getting through another day. Our world becomes smaller and smaller and we stifle our personal feelings, emotions, needs and desires.

Has this happened to you? Do you feel you cannot stop and take time for yourself? Perhaps not so with you. You may be enjoying every day without any thought of self desires. This is good; however, consider how much of what you do, listen to, or talk about is based on the other person’s likes or needs.

Are you prepared to be alone or at least without the one in your care?

The day will come when your situation will change; the need will be different. You may find yourself alone or at least not personally involved with the same people.

For instance, spouses caring for loved ones who are terminally ill will spend all their waking hours wrapped up in the desires and the immediate needs of that person. This can go on for days, week, months, or years. When death does come, the surviving spouse is left alone and seemingly without purpose for a time.

What will happen when your children leave home?

For mothers of young children, the same is true. As a wife and as a parent, we tend to shop with others in mind. We plan our foods according to their likes; we watch what they watch on television, we choose to go where they want to go. Then the children grow up and move on (sometimes) and we get to make our own choices and wonder what we even prefer.

A challenge for you; will you accept it?

Today I want to challenge you whatever your circumstance to consider one thing, just one thing that you would do if you had the choice. Where would you like to go? What project would you like to work on at home? What food would you choose to eat?

Let’s start with food. The next time you are at the store, take a few minutes to stroll down the aisles and consider what you would choose if shopping just for yourself. The first time I was in a store buying for myself, I realized I had several items in my cart that I really didn’t even like; I was buying out of habit. I had shopped so long with others in mind; I wasn’t sure which cereal I preferred. I always ate what others wanted.

You will benefit from the following and so will those in your care!

Grab a notebook and begin writing down some things about yourself that you may not have thought about in a while. What hobbies do you like that you have not had time to pursue? What trips would you like to take? Consider a trip to the library for some books on those subjects; just a few minutes each day would renew your passions and give you a mental and physical rest from the daily routine.

As you enjoy the blessings of those God has entrusted to your care, don’t lose sight of the wonderful, caring individual He created you to be. This week, treat yourself to your personal favorite flavor of ice cream! Life is good! Enjoy!

Hugs,

Click here for more valuable insights  http://www.susiekinslowadams.com/2014/03/01/turning-stress-to-blessing/ and have a great week.