Learning to Listen with Our Hearts

“Are you listening to me? Really listening?” Matthew 11:15 MSG

“I love the Lord because he has heard my voice and my pleas for mercy. Because he inclined his ear to me, therefore I will call on him as long as I live.”  Psalm 116:1-2

I want to learn to listen like that! God inclines His ear to me when I talk. I want to hear with my heart so that I don’t forget what is said to me. I want others to know I do care about them.

Listening involves more than merely hearing.

We are wise to learn to listen. Especially today with so many diversions at our fingertips, focusing our attention on a single conversation can be difficult. As we put forth effort to become a better listener, we benefit others as well as ourselves. You may find, as I have, some of these simple tips are easier said than done!

How you appear to the one speaking may let them know you care.

1. Look the person in the eye as you listen. This may seem oversimplified or unnecessary, especially if you are busy meeting immediate needs and you genuinely feel you don’t have time for conversation. Pausing for a few seconds to look at them directly as you smile or pat a hand or shoulder is a visual sign you genuinely care and have their best interests in hand.

Your answers can help others communicate better.

2. Do give feedback that encourages further communication. No one wants to hear, “I know how you feel”. A better comment would be, “That must be difficult for you”. Saying “I’m so sorry you feel this way” will often help to win trust and build confidence.

There is a time to give advice and a time to wait.

3. Learn to listen without giving advice. This can be extremely difficult, especially if you feel you understand the circumstances. Make a note if you think this is a topic that may need to be addressed at a later time or with others responsible for their well-being.

Click here for what the Bible has to say about listening.

Learn why certain topics are repeated more than others.

4. Try not to get impatient with repeated conversations. Put yourself in the other person’s shoes; consider why these stories might be so important. Listen for clues that may help the person, family, or you as a caregiver.

Most people simply want someone to love them; to genuinely care about their needs.

5. Do not judge the person by what they say. You may not relate to what is said or agree, but you can show the courtesy of listening politely.

Knowing you care will build trust, help reduce tension, and release emotions. Taking time to listen, even for a few short minutes, will encourage further conversations and can produce life-changing results for all.

We can learn from Jesus who said, “Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heaven laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me: for I am meek and ye shall find rest for your souls.”   Matthew 11:28-29

Hugs,

Susie

The Great Caregiver and Comforter

The Great Caregiver and Comforter

What did I hear?

the great caregiver and comforter

Momma said we are safe here.

“The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” Deuteronomy 31:8-9

As I opened my kitchen door and prepared to go out, I was about to interrupt a wildlife picnic. One more move and those beautiful deer would have been out of sight.

In the walnut grove below, a pair of tiny fawns heard the noise and afraid to move another step, they froze in place. As I quietly closed the door, Momma Doe wandered over to her babies. Immediately they relaxed and melted right into the soft grasses below, totally oblivious to anything around them except for a mother’s reassuring presence. Fear was replaced with confidence as they felt the comfort of a mother’s love.

Likewise, the turkeys in the cow pasture stopped as if frozen in their tracks. Sensing danger, they turned quickly and wobbled down the hillside to safety. Secure in the shadows of thick brush, and no longer filled with fear, they gingerly resumed pecking the ground for tasty morsels.

I learn much from watching the critters outside my windows. I relate all too well to those feelings of fear and doubt that paralyze and hamper good judgment. There are new challenges every day of our lives, especially when caring for others.

Can you relate? Do you ever stand paralyzed or frozen in your tracks when facing some circumstance in your life? Maybe it isn’t even anything too great; it just seems overwhelming at the moment. Your breath is short and you can’t seem to shake that feeling of hopelessness.

We have a Comforter who is waiting to help. He is a Great Caregiver. He knows us; every hair on our head is numbered, and every breath we take is by His command.

Click here for 50 verses of comfort.

I want to encourage each reader, whatever your circumstance, to take time to lean on Him for rest.

His word in Psalm 23 reminds us that He will lead us beside still waters and restore our souls.

Again in the 29th Psalm, “ The Lord gives strength to his people; the Lord blesses his people with peace.”

Today I pray for you that you will “cast all your cares upon Him because He cares for you.” And that you will, like the baby deer, allow yourself to melt down into the soft grasses and allow a loving Father to bring you comfort, hope, and peace for your journey.

Hugs,

Susie

Thanks for taking the time to comment. How can I pray for you?

Is It Exhaustion or Life Without Purpose

Is It Exhaustion or Life without Purpose

Third Biblical Coloring and Activity Book, Patches Friendships, Coming Soon

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11 ESV

Jesus generously. poured out His love and grace at our 24th annual Ladies’ Retreat this week. God did a work only He could do. My entire month has been blessed beyond measure.

Even so, a feeling of total exhaustion reared its head again as daily chores, trying to meet writing deadlines, and home and ministry commitments took their toll.

My deadline for completing Patches’ third book, Friendships, was pushed back a bit more as I adjusted my schedule one more time.

My ‘free time’  seemed never to be enough. Time, energy, and the will to push on dwindled fast.

Ever been there? Are you there now? It’s hard to pull out of that mode. You don’t want to do anything right now, see anyone, talk on the phone, or eat — well, let’s re-think that last one!

I needed a short break. A steaming cup of Hazelnut coffee, a double chocolate protein bar, and my feet up on a cozy pillow for a few minutes should do the trick!

As I clicked on the TV for a bit of music, God provided exactly the reminder I needed.  A familiar tape was playing of a young man proclaiming the overwhelming joy of Jesus! He beamed as he talked freely about how personally blessed he was and how much God had done for him. This bold young man was perched on the top of a desk.

This enthusiastic man was Nick Vujicic (click to see photo). Nick was born in Australia without arms or legs. His parents worked hard to get him accepted into a public school where, from an early age, he accomplished what seemed impossible. He learned to use his one “foot” to type on a computer and perform many other tasks.

My feet slid off the stool and onto the floor. I sat straight up in my chair as he continued revealing how anything is possible if you want it badly enough. His early years, I am sure, were extremely difficult. I realized my present tiredness would not hold a candle to his true exhaustion as he worked every day to strengthen and train what muscles he had to achieve his goals.

I struggle with finding time to meet writing deadlines, to read more books, and to become a more faithful witness and friend to others. It takes so little to pull me away from my goals; I wonder how committed I am to finding my purpose.

According to this young man, life without purpose is no life. Living without limbs, he is an author, musician, and actor, and his hobbies include fishing, painting, and swimming. Nick says, “If God can use a man without arms and legs to be His hands and feet, then He will certainly use any willing heart!”  Click here for a life-changing video.

Well, dear friends, that program sure did a lot for my exhaustion! I turned off the television and spent some time asking God for forgiveness and a clean heart. Enthusiastically I sorted the stack of papers lining the dining table and sent out requests for artwork for Patches (drop me a note if you know someone who enjoys sketching.)

You know me well enough to know, I believe we need to rest when we are tired. We need to care for ourselves as we care for others. I believe there is a time to work and a time to play. I believe total exhaustion is real! There are times in our lives when we must stop and care for ourselves.

However, there is also—at least in my life—a form of tiredness that comes from “stinkin’ thinkin’” and I am choosing to change that attitude every time it appears.

I pray for you to find rest and renewal in your life today.

Thanks for leaving a note; I will pray for you.